PTSD
by notUnique.justWeird
Summary: Post traumatic stress disorder. It sucks. This being said, all the Avengers have it one way or another from experiences in their life. Some cases of PTSD are more obvious than others. How do each of the Avengers deal with it?
1. Steve

First PTSD victim is... STEVE.

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

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The windows rattled as another bought of thunder shook the room. A person lying in bed jerked awake terrified. He looked around the room, but he didn't see a room, he saw a battle field. Soldiers were surrounding him, half of them dead. The other half were fighting for what was right. A brave man took another step towards the enemy line and BOOM, a bomb exploded killing the man and the others near him. Steve Rogers shook his head, knowing that this couldn't be happening, he was in his room he told himself, he was safe, the war was over.

"Captain Rogers to my understanding you are having a panic attack," said a voice in the wall called JARVIS, "According to multiple sources, you need to take slow deep breaths and remember that whatever you are seeing is not currently happening. Try to relax."

Steve listened to JARVIS and tried to breathe in deeply. Thunder shook the house again and cringed inward. He took another breath and tried to calm down. He kept reminding himself that he was in Avenger's tower. He was in his room. It was 2012. The war was over. He was safe. He was safe. He was safe. Steve started to relax as the battle field disappeared and the pale blue of his room started to appear. He put his head in his hands as his breathing evened out. JARVIS voice was still gently reminding him that the war was over and that it was 2012, trying to help him not enter his memories of the battles he had fought in.

When his breathing had evened out he stood up and walked over to the window to look at the city he lived in. He loved the view. Many thought he would hate it, but after living in a warzone, having so many people in one place was almost familiar. He did wish the skies were clearer, especially today. Steve had realized by now that the thunder had set off his panic attack. He would talk to Tony later about possibly making his room sound proof. Then he remembered JARVIS.

"JARVIS?" Steve asked.

"What can I do for you Captain Rogers?" responded the familiar AI.

"Oh, nothing, just, thank you for helping."

"You are welcome Captain Rogers, sleep well."


	2. Clint

Okay onto Chapter Two. It is Clint's turn today. Also I'm going with the fact that Clint is 80% deaf and wears hearing aids. If something seems off please tell me.

Trigger Warnings: Past Child Abuse

Clint has a bad day, Natasha is awesome, and the rest of the Avengers just want to know what is going on.

 _Sign Language_

"Spoken English"

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

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It was morning time in the tower, so everyone was gathered in the kitchen. Bruce was sipping his tea. Tony was muttering to himself playing with a tablet that seemed to be displaying an arrow. Steve was chatting to Natasha as she made coffee for them. Clint, well Clint had just blearily stepped into the room, having just woken up.

When Tony realized he had entered, his eyes lit up and he headed over to him pulling the arrow back up onto the screen. Clint hadn't realized Tony was there, he hadn't put his hearing aids in yet, so Tony grabbed his shoulder to get his attention. This is where the day went downhill, and it was only eight o'clock!

Now on a normal day Clint would have maybe flinched at most, but yesterday Clint had been going through some files about his dad. Let's just say Clint was not very fond, and at one time, very much afraid of his father. So, today was not a normal day. Clint reacted, flinching away from Tony and sitting down against a wall with his knees pressed against his chest breathing heavily. This all happened in five seconds. During these five seconds, Natasha had noticed what was going on and rushed over, abandoning her coffee.

 _Clint who do you see_ , Natasha signed. There was no response. Clint! she repeated.

Clint's fingers shook as he signed, _My father_.

 _Okay, Clint you are NOT in Iowa, your father is DEAD, you are SAFE. Can u tell me where you are?_ signed Natasha.

 _Avengers tower,_ was his reply.

 _Good, now take some deep breaths_ , Natasha instructed him.

By this point all the avengers were watching confused for multiple reasons. Firstly, they didn't know sign language. Secondly, they had never seen Clint look so weak. Thirdly, how did Natasha know what was going on, did this happen often?

Tony voiced his concerns, "Okay what the hell is going on?!" His question went unanswered as Clint flinched again and started to whisper I'm sorry over and over again.

Natasha glared at him, "Stark shut up and everyone just back up." The avengers did as was told and gave them space. She then turned to Clint, Hey Clint, I need you to tell me where you are, what do you see.

"I'm at home in Iowa, Barney's in his room and Dad's mad. Dad is really mad," he vocalized. Clint flinched again and if possible curled into himself even more.

 _Clint what you are seeing isn't what is happening. You are having a panic attack. You need to take some deep breaths and realize that you are safe._

After Clint realized it was Natasha, he started to calm down and even out his breathing, realizes that he was in fact safe. When he had done that, he started to stand up and lean against the wall looking at the ceiling trying to get his memories, emotions, feelings, and breathing under control. At this point, the rest of the Avengers were staring at him and Natasha. They were all looking for an explanation.

"Panic attack," supplied Clint, answering their unvoiced questions. He nodded toward Tony, "You grabbed me and I wasn't expecting it, reminded me of my father," he closed his eyes, "My father wasn't very nice." With that, Clint left the room, leaving the Avengers to mull over his words. Natasha just cursed under her breath realizing _she_ would be the one to be answering the rest of their questions. She headed over to her now cold coffee and sighed. What a great way to start the morning.


	3. Natasha

Onto Chapter Three. Today is Natasha. Includes the Hospital Fire.

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

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Natasha sighed. She was exhausted. They, Clint and herself, had just arrived back from a mission. A very exhausting Red Room related mission. She was currently sitting on the couch with Clint fast asleep on top of her. He had a tendency to do that. He stirred, so she muted the TV and put the closed captions on. That's when she saw the fire. In the news a house was burning down.

"No," she muttered. Fire was a trigger to her. She knew it was. It had caused her to have flashbacks before. She needed to focus. Focusing took energy though and that was the one thing she didn't have. Well, she didn't have a lot of things, but this was the one thing she _needed_ that she didn't have. This caused her to be thrown into her memories.

There she hid in a bush, a four year girl watching her home burst into flames. She watched as they enveloped her house and took away her _mama_ , _papa_ , and _braht_. The Red Room had done this because she was seen as a possible recruit and they wanted to test her strength. Losing your family caused you to have to be strong. She hated fire.

The scenery changed, she was no longer in her house, she was in her new home, the Red Room. The girl in front of her was dead. She had killed her. She knew what the Red Room did to dead girls. Dead girls were burned. The girl was her friend, or as close to a friend as she had. She hated fire.

Her next memory was probably her worst, The Hospital Fire. This was the first time she was the one destroying lives with fire. Her instructors told her to light a hospital in Setúbal on fire, making sure there were no survivors. The hospital held anywhere from 800- 1,200 people at the time. She was instructed that there were to be no survivors, so not a single person made it out alive. She hated fire.

The scene was played over and over again in her mind, making it impossible to think about anything else. Someone was murmuring something in the memory, probably begging for help. Fire only killed. The murmuring continued. She then realized the murmuring wasn't from the memory. The person speaking was saying her name. The person was Clint. She slowly let him pull her out of her memories. He was now sitting up, petting her hair as she slowly relaxed against him, sobbing from her memories. He just kept murmuring that it was all over and it never had to happen again as she sobbed into his shoulder. **She hated fire.**

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I hope you enjoyed it. Please review.

~ justWeird


	4. Tony

On to the fourth Avenger, Tony. Tony's symptom of PTSD might be confusing, but I explained it to the best of my abilities. This is an actual symptom of PTSD.

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

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Tony couldn't sleep. Every time he closed his eyes he saw the gaping jaw of the cave he was trapped in with Yinsen, so he worked in his lab instead. For days he sat tinkering in his lab refusing to fall asleep. After a week or so he would eventually pass out from exhaustion and wake up in his bed a day later. He usually remembered to thank Pepper after. The Avengers really messed with this schedule he had going. Saving the world took a lot of energy. Without as much energy, he would fall asleep more. Falling asleep meant the cave.

He didn't have nightmares. Well, he did have nightmares, but not about this. This wasn't a nightmare or another form of messed of dream. The memory was like coffee, it was physically keeping him awake with its horror. When he closed his eyes he saw it, but only when he was awake. Once he fell asleep, he was fine and would sleep for hours. Falling asleep was the problem. JARVIS, of course, adapted to his crazy schedule after Afghanistan and now just notified Pepper when he crashed.

"Sir," came a voice, "Agent Romanoff is at the door."

"Let her in J," was Tony's response. Natasha walked in and sat on one of the unoccupied chairs of the lab.

"Pepper's out of town," she stated.

"I know," he replied. He actually did remember these things.

"You should ask JARVIS to get one of us when you crash," and with that she left the room. He was left shocked, wondering how she knew. Well, she was a super secret spy for a reason he guessed. It was nice to know his team was there. He asked J to do exactly what Natasha had suggested. This didn't solve everything though. He still didn't fall asleep that night, or the next, but the third night after Natasha visited him, he crashed, and a day later he woke up in his bed. Pepper was still out of town.

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Please review, let me know what you think.


	5. Thor

The second to last Avenger is Thor. THis is placed after Thor: The Dark World. If you have not seen that yet !SPOILERS!. Nightmares are a form of PTSD.

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

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Thor watched his brother die. Sure, his brother did try to destroy Midgard, but he watched him die. He loved his brother and, even though he was dead and did some bad things, he always would love him. Watching him die destroyed him, and he started to have nightmares of his death.

When it was nighttime, he fell asleep and dreamed, watching his brother die over and over again. It was a terrible thing that was put upon him every night. He woke up again in terror that night, and left his room to clear his head. He headed towards the common room.

When he arrived, he realized he was not alone. Friend Barton was lying on the couch watching the box of moving pictures. Thor stepped into the room and walked towards him. When Friend Barton noticed him, his hands flew to his ears, turning on, Thor realized, the bright purple hearing aids* that rested there. The Man of Iron had tried explaining how they worked to him, but he had forgotten.

"Hi," said Friend Barton.

"Hello," he replied sitting in one of the chairs.

"Couldn't sleep?" asked Friend Barton.

"Nay, my dreams, they are… quite troubling, and do not allow me to sleep."

"Nightmares?" was Friend Barton's reply.

"Nightmares," the god agreed.

"You know all the shit that they say about how talking about it helps?' asked Friend Barton.

"Yes," replied Thor. He had heard of such phrase.

"It actually works," said Friend Barton. Thor realized Friend Barton was offering to listen to the terrors that affected him in the night, so Thor talked. He explained everything. He even explained Loki's death. Friend Barton just listened. When he was finished, Barton had just one thing to say.

"It sucks to lose a brother, but you move on, and all of his are willing to help you out." He then left the room.

Thor sat for a moment to mull things over. Friend Barton had revealed a lot in that sentence. First, he had a brother. Second, he had lost a brother. Third, he had eventually moved on. Fourth, Thor, and Friend Barton, had friends here. Fifth, he was not alone. **He was not alone.** He headed back to his room and fell asleep. He didn't dream for the rest of the night.

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*No one can convince me differently, Clint, when not on missions, wears bright purple BTE's (behind the ear) hearing aids.

Please review!


	6. Bruce

The final Avenger is Bruce. Bruce was hard to do because I couldn't really see him talking, even not willing talking, to someone about his PTSD, so this doesn't have any dialogue.

Disclaimer: I do not own Marvel.

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No one knew this, but Bruce often dreamed of General Ross. Most would think that he would move on after he had gained the protection of SHIELD and the Avengers, but he never would. Once you have a man after you that's life goal is to kill you, then you could come back and tell him he shouldn't be affected by Ross.

Every night he dreamed about Ross, about how the General's life goal was to kill him, destroy him. He said he was after the Hulk, but he was the Hulk. It wasn't the Hulk _or_ Bruce; it was the Hulk _and_ Bruce. Ross had changed him. The General was the cause of 90% of his nightmares.

Tonight was no different. Bruce woke up sharply, having being ripped out of his dream in sheer terror. He may not remember the Hulk's side of battles when he was awake, but it all came back when he was asleep. He saw the General's tanks taking aim and shooting at him again and again, trying to take him down.

He got up out of bed and started to pace. Remembering his nightmares while he was awake wouldn't help, he had enough of that when he was asleep. He stopped his pacing and walked out onto the deck that was connected to his room to get some cool air. He looked up trying to see the stars. He couldn't see many, the pollution was too heavy. That was the thing he loved the most about all the places he traveled, he could always see the stars.

He breathed in the cool night air for a few minutes and then headed back to bed. As he fell back asleep, he hoped that he didn't dream of Ross. Like usual, his hope was ignored and he dreamt of Ross. He didn't think he ever would stop dreaming about him. After all, Ross was still after him, whether he was protected or not.

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I hope you enjoyed the story. Please review! Also, to everyone that has reviewed, favorited, or followed, thanks a ton, I couldn't have done it without you guys!


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